I had an “a-ha” moment over the weekend. It’s been coming for a long time, but I finally stopped long enough to let it sink in. I’m not happy blogging. I don’t mean that I don’t like to blog. I love to blog. But I’m not happy with the way I’ve been blogging. And I owe you all an apology. I owe myself an apology!
Let me explain. I’m an introvert. A pretty big introvert. And for a long time, I was happy sitting anonymously behind my computer. I was on a mission: to get out of debt. I had a pretty good story, especially after my husband lost his job right about the time I started blogging. I enjoyed writing and interacting with you all, even during the stress of my husband’s unemployment.
Then the recession hit in full force. Suddenly frugality was big news. Living without credit cards was chic. Saving money was the new cool. I was interviewed by several news sources and was featured in Redbook magazine. It was exciting. It also blew my cover.
My local friends and family found out about my blog. Don’t get me wrong. Everyone has been supportive in every way. But with the anonymity gone, the perfectionist in me kicked in, and I panicked. Like a deer staring into the headlights of an oncoming car, I froze. My writing went from personal to impersonal. I pulled back. I was afraid to say something wrong. I was afraid of being imperfect, even though I knew in my heart that perfection was unachievable. And suddenly, I wasn’t such a happy blogger anymore. And truth be told, you all probably haven’t been happy readers either. Believe me, I understand.
So, where do I go from here? Well, I spent a long time thinking about that. I’m not completely sure. But this is what I do know. I’m a frugal living, coupon clipping, homeschooling, family-loving, Christian woman. And I have a passion for helping others save money and kick debt to the curb. In a world that says families need two full time incomes to live well, I firmly believe that you can live more while spending less. That’s what the banner on my blog has said for the last couple of years, and that’s where I want this blog to return. Oh, I’ll still do a review here and there, if I think it’s beneficial. But I’d like to focus more on how to save money, even when (or especially when) you don’t have a big budget.
So, goodbye impersonal posts. Goodbye self-induced, self-conscious stress. Goodbye trying to be someone I’m not.
Ahhhh. I’m back. And it feels good!
Photo by audreyjm529.
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Hi Lynnae, sounds like you’ve made the right decision for you. I much prefer blogs from a personal stand point, so I’m looking forward to reading your future posts :-)
Congratulations on having your a-ha moment. I too find personal blogs far more interesting. It is fun to see how other families live and deal with issues.
I am on the fence about staying anonymous and after reading your post, I’m going to stay anonymous.
Glad to hear – have missed the way you used to blog!
Good for you! I’m also a pretty extreme introvert and I had my cover blown in a couple of articles in the Canadian press. I know exactly how you feel. I thought I would be really happy to get some buzz for my blog, but instead I felt really self-conscious – like I had to kick my writing up a notch or something.
We are also a single income family and have recently experienced quite a drastic income reduction. I’m looking forward to some ideas on how to pare back our spending to make it fit our new income level!
Good for you! I enjoy the personal stuff myself, but you do a great job no matter what you are writing about. I hope you will be happy, though. Life and time with our families are too short not to be.
Thank you! I personally have almost unsubscribed a few times because it just didn’t ‘feel’ like the same blog that I had subscribed to in the first place. It felt-honestly- commercialized. I’m so glad you’re back and ready to pick up where you left off! I am on a mission to get out of debt and I need the support & guidance of not just Dave Ramsey-I need a real mom, homeschooler, etc. That would be you and a few others I’ve found. :)
Ya know, I noticed a change in your blogging around that time. Once Redbook hit and Walmart moms and all that, your blog just sorta had a different feel. And I’m not saying that in a bad way — but it was just *different* ya know?
I’m not sure how you can undo what has been done, but I’ve always been your fan and I will continue to be!
Thanks for continuing to read. I don’t know that I can undo anything, or even that I’d want to. Like mistakes in finances, it’s more about learning from mistakes and moving on.
As a fellow introvert I can understand your reluctance to be too much in the spotlight.
Like others, I had noticed the change in your blog. Would check in and think ‘just another generic post today’ and not bother to read it.
Anyway, good luck going forward. Hope you regain your love of writing.
welcome back, Lynnae! I think Being Frugal is going to be better than ever.
Awesome! It takes a lot of guts to be this candid with your readers and to reset and go back to what you love. I’m fairly new to your blog but I look forward to following you more closely.
Thank you all for sticking around! I have the best readers ever!
Lynnae~
it’s interesting how many of us seem to be re-evaluation lately. It’s such a strange balancing act-we all started blogging because we love it, and yet it was also to be heard. If we didn’t want folks to read, well we’d write and stuff the pages under our mattress. So there is an element to wanting an audience and feeling you have to grow because of that push.
Also lets be honest-writing a good blog, keeping it up to date and full of relevant yet new material is WORK. It may be work we love, but it is still work. So at what point and how do we monetize that? I know my personal issue has been how can I justify the time and effort I spend on my blog-and therefore the time and effort that I am NOT spending either on my house, my family or on a job (not saying I neglect them, just that there is a finite amount of time in the day) if there is no monetary return. . .
I don’t know the answer to that-I’m wrestling with it myself. I know I loved doing the Frugal Coast2Coast podcasts with you, but the time and effort involved were more than the return. . . ditto on so many other projects out there.
Well, enough navel gazing-congrats to you on your ahh haa moment, and to any and all new directions-I know you and I know it will be fabulous no matter what you do.
It is a difficult balance. I think it’s easier when you go into blogging with a plan, thinking you’re going to make money or be a nationally recognized writer or whatever. But if you’re like us, you go into it with no expectations. I never knew anyone would read me. So instead of having a plan, I’ve made decisions on the fly. Sometimes they’ve been good decisions, and sometimes they’ve been bad decisions. And I’m sure I’ll continue to make good decisions and bad decisions. But at least now I feel like I have some sort of mission or direction.
In 4 weeks we’ll be done with school for a few months, so I’ll think about how maybe Frugal Coast2Coast can fit into the mix. I loved it too, but there’s only so much time…
Thanks for your honesty lynnae – it is tough and I think if you stick with blogging for a couple years it is kind of an inevitable challenge that needs to be dealt with – glad to see you are blasting right through it!
This is serendipitous! I was just asking myself as I clicked your link, if today was the day I should unsubscribe! Glad I waited. I eagerly look forward to your future posts! I value authenticity more than just about anything else, and impersonal feels fake to me.
I have mentioned to my husband and daughters that I am blogging, but only sent a link to one of my girls. I don’t want to post on Facebook about it, because I already “friended” too many people I do NOT want to hear from.
I need to be free to be who I am, not the me I pretended to be and tried to be, for so long.
God bless your new direction, Lynnae
Thanks for being honest. I have been missing the money saving twists of your posts. I am usually a lurker but today I had to say something. I use and abuse the blogs that keep saving money in focus for me. I’m glad your back to the old you. Look forward to reading more money saving ideas. Repeating stuff is O.K. cause either I wasn’t ‘there’ the last time you mentioned it or I’d forgotten or it’s good to have the reminder again. Enough now, I’m starting to babble.
Thanks for opening up to us! I hope this blog helps you realize how much you ARE helping people out, even if you get a little personal sometimes. At times, that could be the spot where it brings it all home for us.
I’m thinking of starting my own blog on a site other then blogger.com. If you would like to email me some advice, I’d greatly appreciate it! You seem to know a lot and I’d love to throw some ideas your way to see ifyou think I’d be good at it or not.
Glad you’re back…I’ve missed you. ;)
Congratulations!
I recently had a “Welcome to my imperfection” epiphany. It’s work not falling back into old holding patterns, but so worthwhile.
Just consider it a redirection – a refocus….we all do it time to time. :)
You were stretching yourself rather thin, so glad you will be finding more “you” time, and hopefully more family time.
and now…. back to basics :) Thanks!
Hey – personally… I want to hear how your garden does this year – so let us know occasionally! My peas are about 4 inches tall now – hope this hail hail hail the past 36 hours hasn’t flattened them! Nice thing about peas tho is they usually recover!
And remember – a garden is almost Free food!
My garden is not doing well so far. I got sick and didn’t get it started. So I’ll be starting with summer veggies, rather than spring veggies. But that’s OK. Better late than never.
Enjoy the peas! We haven’t had any hail yet, but I’ve been hearing rumors of overnight snow.
Looking forward to the good thigns to come.
Congrats on the self reflection – that’s the hardest kind.
Congrats on “figuring things out”. I find myself contstantly changing my blogging/business model so it’s nice to sometimes just pick a direction and go with it.
I’d like to hear more about home schooling – maybe describe a typical day?
As if we had any typical days. LOL
That’s one of the things I’m pondering. I’d like to write more about homeschooling, but I don’t know whether I should do that here or elsewhere. It’s certainly easier for me to keep all my blogging in one place…I’m still thinking about it.
Oh, Lynnae – I’m so happy to read this. I’ve missed the way your blog was in the early days – certainly no need to undo anything, but I’m so happy you’re going back to your blogging roots. Will always stick with you! :-)
I still enjoy the blog, but can’t wait for it to get back to the original, more personal posts. I do understand the fear of not saying the right thing, people can be so judgemental. Just know that most of those people live in glass houses. Keep up the good work and I look forward to the renewed direction.
Great news! I have considered unsubscribing but now I am glad I didn’t. I have been doing the frugal thing for over 33 years and I still love to read the particulars of how others REALLY do it. I learn or re-learn alot that way. Plus it lets me know I have company on my journey that really walk the walk and don’t just talk the talk. Specific examples are easier to remember and implement than generic articles for the masses. Thanks.
Good for you!
That’s great! I have enjoyed reading your posts up until now, but I’m sure I’ll enjoy it even more now. Good for you on your decision.
I’m an introvert too and have actually avoided a few media opportunities that could have helped my blog simply because I didn’t want my cover blown. Yes, some family and friends read my blog but most don’t have a clue. Thanks for sharing and welcome back.
I am very proud of you for going “old school” and going back to your “roots”! I’ve always enjoyed your blog, even when it was a bit “impersonal”. But now that you are going to be writing from the “heart”, it will be better than ever!
When I finally met you, I was surprised by how much of an introvert you were. Here you are were this nationally recognized blogger that was actually quite shy! But even in the hour that the three of us had dinner together, I saw you loosen up a bit and become much more comfortable. I really enjoyed talking with you and your husband. It was a very nice evening that we should do again some time!
Keep up the great work! You are a wonderful person who has a great story to tell. God is using you to touch people all over the world!
I am looking forward to the return of you! Lately, I havent been reading your blog, just look at the title and click away. I am ready to read about you and your life again!
Good for you! I feel your pain, I happen to be a closet introvert .. ;-)
Good for you for having your a-ha moment and being true to yourself and to your readers. I’m so happy that you’ll continue to blog and keep it real for all of your readers.
The hardest part of blogging is being yourself. I struggle with that idea of “perfection”, as if such a thing exists on the internet! You do things your way, and hope by communicating it, you can help someone, some way. That’s all I hope for. Sure, people will disagree, criticize. Everyone has their own opinion. Don’t let that stop you! I’m looking forward to hearing more of your “real” story, how you live more and spend less, about homeschooling, your garden (no matter what’s happening!), and more. It’s all about the journey!
You’ve taken a big step forward just writing this. Thanks for the inspiration!
Wow! That is really scary. My blog is not popular enough to get me any notoriety, but the what if factor kind of bugs me. Also, my in-laws discovered I’m writing a blog, then some English speaking ones actually started to read it—I dunno, it kind of freaked me out! And I felt a little burnt out too for a while. Thanks for posting on this.
thanks for posting this. this is very important stuff for me to read as i begin a new project of my own…
I too have struggled with some of the same issues as you and I found your honesty in this post very refreshing. It is this type of honesty that got you where you are and this certainly serves as a great reminder to other bloggers! Kudos to you Lynnae.
I’m so glad to hear this! I found your blog long ago and loved it. I did notice a change though and it hasn’t been quite as interesting to read. I can’t wait to read the good stuff again. :) Nobody is perfect.
I was just thinking to myself, “Too bad there aren’t more frugal living blogs with good tips out there,” and decided to check here. I used to check every day, but started checking only every few weeks and not actually reading the posts. I can’t wait to read more tried and true tips.
GOSH!!!
That is exactly how I feel!
I am sorta sad people who know me…..read my blog!
I feel that pressure to be perfect too!
It really wrecks my abiblity to cut loose and WRITE!
I’ve had serious reservations about so many posts.
I’ve actually conformed to what I think everyone wants me to do and say!
Grrrr.
I’m feeling encouraged to move on and JUST DO IT the way I really want to.
Courage….where are you?
:)
Just do it! I was so scared to write this post. I was afraid I was killing my blog, but I knew I couldn’t stand to continue on the way things were going.
And look at the response! I think sometimes we fool ourselves into thinking we know what others want to hear, but in reality our readers just want us to be real, to be ourselves.
Reading your blog is more like reading a friend’s blog…. and that’s the most fun type to read!
You’re a Virgo, aren’t you? Don’t worry, you’re doing fine, and I’m sure upcoming posts will be even better!
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