Buy something expensive, kids break it, mommy and daddy just buy them something new.

Be frugal, buy something for the kids, if they break it, it’s broken and can’t afford to get another one so this gets the kids treating what they do have with more respect.

So first, here is my frugal brag:

My husband and I bought our wedding rings from an online store that uses Platinum with Cubic Zirconia. My rings are beautiful, I always get compliments, and its a nice little secret that my husband and I are proud of. That is not to say that I am embarrassed by my decision. I am proud of it and have told my best friends and parents. We put the money we saved into paying down the principal on our residence.

But we do send our daughter to a very expensive private school, and did also send her to an expensive private kindergarten as well. It has been an investment that has paid off well in three ways

1)The school reinforces our values, and in status crazy Los Angeles, actually hosts the kids birthday parties in the gym and provides all the party planning. The kids and parent love it, and besides saving us money and the pressure of the ever bigger B-day party escalation, it has introduced us to parents with similar values. While kids in her neighborhood are always watching TV and talking about the latest toy or food item they want, she is playing outside, or reading and could care less that the TV is showing the video she thought she wanted to watch 5 min before. Meaning, she wants to watch TV like regular kids, but finds it less satisfying and usually moves on to other pursuits.

2)She is excited about learning. When she gets home, she can’t wait to show what she has learned and actually wants us to challenge her with the next level of instruction. She is testing at well above 2nd grade level as she prepares to finish preschool this year.

3)Even though she is an only child from divorced parents (she is my step daughter), she plays and works well with other children and gets along with children of all ages and abilities. I am always humbled by the kindness, patience and love she shows to her mentally delayed cousin when they play together. And impressed when she fearlessly makes friends with new older children when she goes to a playground (she often ends of being the leader of play, even though the other kids are older).

I am sure a lot of what is great about my step daughter comes from her innate nature, but I know that there are a lot of kids that start with a wonderful light in their eyes and end up dreading the next day of school and eventually life, when they are improperly nurtured. The nurturing starts at home, but MUST be supported and enhanced by the school that the child attends. If you have a school in your community that delivers that nurturing and encourages your child to grow as a person as well as a learner, and that school is a public one, then that’s a fantastic resource for your community. I know a lot of people who choose the communities they live in for that very reason. But in my community, there is no such public school and we would stop all spending for anything other than food, shelter, and clothing, before we would consider sending our child to an inadequate or even dangerous school.

Resell value is definitely something to consider.

But my real point is this. expensive stuff is really only very expensive brand new. and second hand quality holds its value. therefore if you buy the brand second hand. you get the status and the quality and when you are through with it you can sell it on ebay and get most of your money back. specifically with baby stuff. My stroller cost about £GBP500 new and is worth about £250 second hand. Bugaboos are about £GBP850 new, £500 second hand. am about to buy an expensive but quality high chair (a tripp trapp) which would cost £GBP165 in a shop, £140 on internet or £100 on ebay.