When I started blogging, I promised myself that I would be completely authentic as a blogger. I knew this journey of paying off debt wouldn’t be an easy one, and I knew I’d have bad days…bad weeks even. This is one of those times.
I’ve been sitting here for twenty minutes trying to think of a great blog post idea, but the truth is, I’m pretty discouraged in our mission right now, and my brain can’t seem to come up with a great frugal idea.
You see, my husband’s new job isn’t going to well. Once again we need to prepare ourselves for the possibility that we’ll be without an income. Or that he might have another job soon, which means adjusting to new paydays, a new schedule, and another learning curve for my husband.
I’m not at all frustrated with my husband. He works hard and has a lot of integrity in his work. You hear horror stories all the time of people who take sales jobs, and then attend to personal business during sales hours. It takes forever for the boss to wise up, because there’s so much independent work in sales. My husband doesn’t do any of that. He works hard during work hours, and he does what he says he’ll do. I’m not sure why his jobs aren’t going well. It could be the local economy. It could just be that God wants us to go in another direction. Who knows? But it’s hard.
It’s hard to see my husband feeling like he’s failing our family. It’s hard to know what to do to support him. It’s hard to know what jobs he should apply for or if we should look into moving. It’s hard to feel like we move two steps forward, only to move three steps back.
So that’s where we’re at. Still committed to getting out of debt, but frustrated with the way it’s going. Tired of the uncertainty. And sometimes downright afraid of what the future holds.
I feel like we should do a public service announcement on debt. This is your life. This is your life in debt. Any questions? :)
So there you have it. A peek into the thoughts that run through my brain. Debt and finances are not fun. I know we will be OK. I know God will take care of us. I just wish I knew how.
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Lynnae,
I’m so sorry :(
First of all, try not to make yourself feel bad for not coming up with a frugal idea everyday. Your blog is great and you have a lot of ideas.
Second, I truly hope things change soon with your husband’s job. He sounds like an incredibly hard worker and any employer would love to have someone as dedicated as him. The Lord has a plan for ya’ll; just keep looking out for that door that He opens which will lead to better things.
It is hard not knowing what is going to happen,it is discouraging but, You and your Dh and family will get through this :).
4 1/2 years ago dh and I were at our lowest point financially and then just 6 months later dh wanted to put in his release with the military…everything just came at once with financial hardship and then dh wanting to leave his job. He had a part-time job on the side at the time but no promises for full time employment. We had a mortgage and all of our bills etc on top of that. Dh had been with the military for 23 years that is the life we and our children had always known.Dh did receive a military pension after his release but that was a couple of months or so after and wasn’t enough to support our family and pay for everything. would your dh be entitled to unemployment?
I did “Lots” of Praying and even when one thinks there is no wheres else to cut back on groceries,phone etc we seemed to find a way.
It is discouraging but, everything started to fall into place for us, not overnight mind you but we managed. Dh ended up getting a full time job where he worked part time about 2 or 3 months after his release with the military.
I realize that every families situation is different and like you I knew that God had plans for us.It is very hard however and there were times when I wanted to tell dh “no” you cannot put in your release, what are you thinking?” etc…but I didn’t, I knew in my heart that he needed to do this and I needed to support his decission no matter how hard it was. I asked him what he needed from me to make sure I was there for him 100%,even though I was doing my best, I just wanted to make sure that there wasn’t something that he needed from me support wise that I had overlooked.
I don’t know if you have an emergency fund but even if somehow you could get even a couple of hundred put aside, try stockpiling, frugal mixes,etc..even $20 seems like and is a lot of money. you might already be doing all of this among other things to prepare for the “just in case”.
I am thinking of you and your family,and I am sending Oodles of Prayers and Hugs your way :)
Thanks for the encouragement. I really do know things will eventually work out, and probably for the better. And I appreciate the prayers.
We do have an emergency fund. We could probably make it a month to a month and a half with no income. We also have an IRA that we could cash out if we really had to. We really don’t want to do that though.
I think the thing that discourages me the most is that our emergency fund came from a small inheritance, and our plans were to pay off all our debt with that money. But instead we’ve had to live off of it. I’m glad we had it to live on, but still, when I know that we were supposed to be debt free by now, it’s hard.
It’s so scary to think of job changes, moving, etc. I know your trust in God will be a comfort if things turn bad.
Everything will work out.
This stinks. There’s not a pretty way to say it.
I know it will work out eventually, but it is so hard to get to that eventually place! I really hope things sort out with your husband’s job or the perfect opportunity arises.
You know me – I totally believe in just laying it all out there on the blog, good or bad. You’re not just a source of useful knowledge, your journey, the ups and the downs, are an inspiration.
Ack! That’s the hardest, I know. I’ve been in similar shoes, and they pinch in all the wrong places.
For what little it’s worth, I find your blog really helpful and encouraging, and look forwards to reading you when you can post. I’m not going anywhere if you need to take a few days off.
I’ll be adding you to my prayer list from over here in the UK.
As Julian of Norwich said, “All is well, all is well, and all manner of things shall be well.”
Thanks for being so forthright with your worries. It definitely isn’t your husband’s fault. He sounds like a very hard worker and sales is a difficult field to be in.
I’m sure that God will show you the way.
Tired of the uncertainty. And sometimes downright afraid of what the future holds.
I stumbled upon your blog while reading Mary Hunt’s blog…wow, your blog is on her blogroll! That’s encouragement!!!
Of course we don’t know what the future holds and fear of the future is part of the human condition, if you will. We want to know what is ahead so we can control it, but what it really boils down to is do we have trust in God? I don’t actually know where you are in your spiritual journey, and we are all on one, whether we realize it or not. But the Truth is we are not, nor ever will be in total control of our future. We do have One we can trust with it, though and He is True to His word. (Which is good, b/c we humans are kind of lame in that area, even the best of us.)
Take heart, remember His mercies are new every morning, great is His faithfullness.
And from what I have read you are being transparent with your blog…you don’t have to dump everything out there for the internets to peruse, though. Say what you mean, mean what you say and pray through the rest.
As far as coming up with “a great frugal idea”…honestly, there are probably about a dozen truly useful, practical and original frugal ideas out there…what makes the blogpost interesting is how you and your family have interpreted them!
I hope you are encouraged, even a little. I have sooo been where you are…my blog is so random, (so is my brain :)), I haven’t even thought about blogging about our debt freedom journey…it’s not even mentioned. But we are on it, too. And we all know it isn’t easy or exactly f.u.n. but there are rewards to be had…keep your eyes on the prize, sister!!
Ah, but don’t you see what a really _excellent_ post this has been! Really! We all need to be reminded that bad stuff happens and that not every day is a winner . . . and that we need to trundle right along doing what’s right anyway. Faith, love, hope and sheer doggedness are more important than tons of clever hints and tips, any day. Even in your down times, you’ve been an inspiration. Thank you and God bless you all.
Bless you all for brightening my day! I’m feeling encouraged and a bit better!
@Ann – It is encouraging to be on Mary Hunt’s blogroll. I even wrote a post about it, I was so excited! :) And I do have faith that God will work this out for us. I KNOW we won’t end up on the streets. It’s just that the journey gets tiring sometimes. What it comes down to is me not totally surrendering control to God, and that’s been a lifelong struggle for me. Thanks for the reminder.
@Vic – I’m glad you think this is an excellent post. I think I misrepresented my feelings a bit when I said I was trying to come up with a clever frugal tip. I don’t feel that I need to have clever little tips everyday, but when I was feeling discouraged, I was trying to think of ANYTHING to write about, other than my feelings. And I couldn’t come up with anything.
I’m glad I wrote about what I was feeling though. I do think it’s important to know that getting out of debt isn’t always easy once you set your mind to it. There are definite ups and downs. I’m in a down time right now, but I’m confident an up will follow…hopefully soon. :)
Sales is such a hard job. It looks so easy to people who’ve never done it, but it is really really difficult. I hope things turn around for you soon.
Lynnae, I’m sorry to hear of your hardship right now. I hope that things will get better soon. I’ll be praying for you and your family.
I think it’s hard to lay it all out, even in blogland. Something about seeing the reality in print makes it harder, at least for me! Just take heart that there are lots of us out there having set backs & nothing makes them take center stage than the creeping thought that holidays are right around the corner…
Sales isn’t for everyone, been there done that. But every failure my hubby ever had led him the great company he is with now, it just took an extra 10 years of random (or so we thought) experiences.
Try to take comfort in knowing that you have tons of support & prayers!
Thanks for the continued encouragement. I am amazed at how many of you have stopped by to comment and encourage me along!
@Lisa – “But every failure my hubby ever had led him the great company he is with now, it just took an extra 10 years of random (or so we thought) experiences.” — I know my husband’s experiences will lead him to something much better. The wait is sure hard, though!
Just want to say that you have a good head on your shoulder and I think you will be fine. Just set realistic goals and keep working toward it — everything will work out.
Once a friend was in a desperate situation and she said to me, “I am SO EXCITED to see what God is going to do to take care of this for me. It is going to be so awesome!”
I was FLOORED. Bowled over. Speechless. I had NEVER heard anyone say that and I was raised as a Christian – yet I never heard anyone say that until I was 29. So now, I am saying, Lynnae, I am SO EXCITED to see what God is going to do to take care of this for your family. I don’t know what it will be or when but I KNOW you will share it with us and it is gonna be awesome!!
@Pinyo – Thanks!
@Jenny – I do feel that way sometimes. Then I get scared. Then I get tired. Then I get excited again. I know God’s going to work it all out, and you can bet I’m going to post about it when He does!
My prayers are with you guys. I’ve been down on my luck before too. Remember, He has a plan, a purpose, and a way. It’s just not clear to us mortal folks sometimes. :)
Thanks, Money Blue Book. You’re very right. :)
Oh my gosh i so relate to you…my husband is in sales too and was just layed off for the 5th time in 13 years….this has just depleted us financially, emotionally, spiritually, and even physically. We are striving so hard to find a new direction but when thats al the experience you have it is so hard…..we just pray for that one chance to just open up for us…..its amazing how difficult this is…..my husband works so hard too…he has even earned awards and made presidents club but stil gets the boot…i am just trying to have patience..i have stayed home raising children for 16 years and now i have had to push me in the work place part-time at the local school…which I am not complaining……i am so grateful to be there working where my children are but unemployment is a hard thing for a man to go through….its so dang hard…its nice to find others feeling the same way…thanks for your blog